thats how it is.

TK Chapter Ten - Another Angle

2010-08-04T19:47:00.000-05:00

Describe some of the benefits of the incarnational approach for you and your community.

I think there are a numerous amount of benefits in having an incarnational approach for any community. If I were to name a few for myself it would be that I would have a group of people that are supportive that I can count on. I also see that there is a great benefit in having a team of people to do something that is similar, rather than trying to do something on my own.

For a community, I think there is a type of infiltration that this approach can bring that is undeniable and unresistable. People have all sorts of needs. I think of the ministry of Jesus and his pronouncement in Luke 4:16-20 – which is a quote from Isaiah 61. “The Spirit of the Lord is upon me, because he has anointed me to proclaim good news to the poor. He has sent me to proclaim release to the captives and the regaining of sight to the blind, to set free those who are oppressed, to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.”

If we are to take this type of stance in making the kingdom of God incarnational in a community, it would be transformed. When we go in the anointing of the Holy Spirit and bring the Kingdom of God into a community, the only thing that can happen is change. People who have struggled by themselves with issues of life can receive help; those who are poor can be blessed; those who are alone are not alone anymore; those who are widows have others to depend on; any orphans receive a family; the oppressed can know freedom; the ones who have been bound up in chains can know the Lord who frees them; all can experience and know the tangible and real love of the Father. It is something to experience directly from him and directly through his people. A community that is affected by people who are dedicated to living this type of sacrificial and incarnational life cannot help but be affected.

What is getting in the way of you providing the incarnational path for others?

I think that at this point in time, I am not sure where to go from here. I was telling a friend the other day that I feel that I am on the edge of idealism and action. It’s like there is a threshold for idealism before it starts to spill out into action, and that’s where I feel that I am. The thing is, that it seems to me that the action part is much bigger and greater than I could have anticipated. It really blows the idealism out of the water.

The other question I have for myself is… am I really there? Do I understand all this different kind of Christianity in my head or in my heart or both? And, if I start doing this even more with my life, is it going to be real and genuine or is it just going to be an attempt at something I think is right…?

Chapter 9 - Jipped

2010-07-29T14:43:00.000-05:00

Quote from the chapter:

“There’s a clear connection between the Old Testament concept of ‘blessing’ and Jesus’ concept of ‘the Kingdom of God’ described in Mark 1:15. When Jesus came proclaiming the ‘good news of the Kingdom,’ or what we would call the ‘gospel,’ he was not trying to get people to simply pray a prayer so they could go to heaven. He was saying that anyone can live differently because ‘my Kingdom is now.’

When we focus on the gospel primarily as another world to come after we die, we are missing a massive part of the story. We’re missing the part that is good news to a real person. The afterlife is an important part of the story and is good news when you’re dying, or have a friend who has just passed, or if you happen to be under great persecution and can’t even think beyond your prison cell. But when people aren’t in close proximity to death, they need to see the difference that God’s world makes in their world.”

This chapter is about how the good news is much much more than just a message to be received and a prayer to be prayed so that someone can have their slot in heaven. It’s about God’s kingdom being made tangible in everyday life and making a big difference in the things we struggle through.

In what ways have you felt jipped by a short-sheeted gospel?

I think the way that I’ve been jipped by the short-sheeted gospel is that I’ve learned and understood so much about Christianity from that stand-point. It is now hard work trying to trudge through the muck in order to experience God’s kingdom in my own life and to live a life that proclaims his kingdom and his love. I feel I’ve also been jipped because so much of Christianity is giving out short-change. I feel like I’m somewhat alone in what I’m coming to understand because “Christianity” has made it acceptable to have a relationship with God but not actually do anything different in life. Seems like an oxymoron.

TK Chapter 8 - Paradigm

2010-07-29T12:50:00.000-05:00

At the end of the chapter, Halter offers a quick recap: “The incarnational big-story gospel will require a place of discovery, where people will be able to see the truth before they hear about it. This place will not be a location but a community of people who are inclusive of everyone. These people will be making eternity attractive by how they live such selfless lives now, and will be modeling life in a New Kingdom in ways that will make it easy for other people to give it a try. People like this aren’t desperate to convert everyone; they are desperate to be like Christ and to be where Christ is. Their heartbeat to be transformed into the image of Christ, and to pray and work for little specks of transformation in everyone and everything they touch. Success is faithfulness. The rest is up to God.”

Here's the comparison table that is formed throughout the chapter:

	Western	Eastern	Postmodern	Gospel Response
Why We Believe	Reason	Faith	Preference	Discovery
How we view relationships	Autonomous	Holistic	Pluralistic	Inclusive Community
What We Value	Security	Legacy	Gratification	Eternity
How We Influence	Institutions	Tradition	Deconstruction	Modeling
How We Measure Success	Product	Process	Justification	Transformation

“Which of the three paradigms (Western/Eastern/Postmodern) do you identify with?”

The two ways I relate to the Western Paradigm are in valuing security and measuring success by a product or something that is noticeable. Valuing security=not being risky!!

More and more I am getting out of the autonomous western system and more into inclusive community- but it feels like I’ve got a ways to go.

“Which of the five gospel responses do you most identify with and/or struggle with?”

I think I relate to the area of discovery in why I believe – it seems to be that God’s shown me a lot of things through that way, rather than reason. I struggle with the measuring success by transformation because I suppose I’m not sure how that plays out in real life. Also, influencing via modeling…. That seems to be something that I hold back in. For instance, it is easier to think that you could influence people from the pulpit rather than going through the rough with someone in their life and having people watch that.

This chapter was really good to read because it really helped put a good perspective on how we need to responds to the major world views and how people think. It was also good at exposing some of the weak points in all of these paradigms. I realize that the Lord has been changing my life so that I can’t be easily defined or fit well into any of the three major paradigms. He’s been drawing me more and more into a life that is defined by Kingdom values rather than world values. It’s hard though, because I have much more influence in my life from the world – media, people, etc. Being influenced by the Kingdom means being very intentional, and that can be difficult in and of itself because of the busyness of our lives- or as a friend likes to say, “Noise.”

TK Chapter 7 – The 1700-Year Wedgie

2010-07-23T12:42:00.000-05:00

“What are the personal tensions you are processing as the church is transitioning from the center of culture to the margins of culture? What tensions will this cause in most churches?”

I think one of the tensions I am faced with in the marginalization of the Church is trying to understand what my role is in it all. What is my role in the Church and how can I best live and do kingdom work within the context of transitions that are happening in the Church? I may also have some tensions related to the inability of traditional forms and programs being able to actually change people. It is easy to plug in to something and be a part of something. It is not easy to be a part of something that challenges your life in every facet. Traditionally, the church has been a place that is more of a spiritual pacifier rather than a place that cultivates authentic Christian living and spiritual formation. So then, as there is transition within the Church to different forms etc., what kind of ministry can be done that is effectually going to bring change to a broken culture?

I think there will be an increasing tension in most Churches. As they try to continue with traditional forms, they will be faced with the dilemma that the next generation is no longer interested. “That’s the way we have always done it” will produce nothing and will leave many people hanging out to dry. In all honesty, the traditional forms of Church will dry up and die unless they catch the heart of God and get on board with what he is doing and how he wants to use his people to engage the North American culture. We can no longer stay behind and squander our time in what we have always been doing. Church can’t be “easy” anymore…

“Which of the three values of the ancient faith communities (sacrificial community, confrontation, inclusive community) would be the most intimidating for you to participate in? Why?”

I think the first two would be more intimidating for me. Sacrificial community means that my safe little life can’t be just my own anymore- it means that I have to share it and basically have an “open book” sort of life. That’s hard. I think the hard part about it is that what I value in life has to change. I have a fairly simple life and I don’t own much, however, even what I do own I can’t hold on to so tightly. Or what about having complete strangers in my home? Can I just trust everyone that is going to walk in the door? My safety and security may be on the line! It’s very different from what our culture does. We don’t even have our own friends over to our houses that much let alone strangers and people who are socially outcast. The other difficulty I face is that in my head I know that this is all good and right, but in my heart and where I’m at I don’t feel that I’m there yet.

The confrontation aspect of community is also difficult. It demands straight up honesty and it also means that I would have to get over my fears about confrontation. This year this has been happening more and more, however, it is hard and there are times that I still sort of shut down when it comes to being confrontational.

TK Chapter 6 – Posture

2010-07-23T12:41:00.000-05:00

The thrust of this chapter is that of being a part of people’s lives (outside of the church) in such a way that we are there for them in the middle of their need and we help them rather than standing aloof and just preaching a message to them about their circumstances. An example from Jesus was used when he advocated for the prostitute before the Pharisees who wanted to throw rocks at her in condemnation.

One part that I found hard to read through was the basis for this chapter – that rather than insisting on preaching the gospel message, that we posture ourselves differently as advocates for peoples lives. I found it hard because it communicates the idea of being like Christ to the people around us in hopes that they will somehow get it and start following him. I have always said that this approach is fine, however, there needs to be a balance between the acting and speaking. Can one know what Christ has done for them without being told somehow? I don’t think so. At some point, it needs to be said.

Now, something that comes to mind is that what the typical evangelical approach to this “being like Christ” would be just living a “good life” and being nice. I think what Hugh is getting at in this book is much different in that it requires a great amount of sacrifice to love people in the midst of whatever they may be going through.

Jesus always took the opportunity to love people and to look past what they might have been doing wrong to see the value in them. This enabled him to understand their life and their actions rather than stand back, point, and condemn.

“How are you willing to advocate for people while they live lives that are in opposition to the way of Christ?”

I think that I am willing to do many different things. I think there are some things that I have to push through, though. I think that I may have been burned in the past by stepping out to help people or advocate for them in the way this chapter portrays. A particular context for this is with needy people who I have a hard time saying “no” to. In the end I get wiped out by them and feel quite trampled and drained. I believe that I may also have a fear of loving people in the full capacity that I can. There are numerous times in the past that I have done this only to be betrayed and hurt. I suppose this is all part of the risk of loving people the way they deserve to be, but it is quite hard.

There are times when I think about hanging out with thugs and the like. I’m not sure why I would, but I do know that there is a need there and I believe there are few who will take a risk and do something like that.

I find this a hard question to answer honestly. Part of me thinks it is a great idea. Part of me thinks that I would rather sit back in my comfortable little life and do my own thing because that’s okay- but it’s not.

“If you could no longer use words to communicate the gospel, what would you do?”

Actions speak very loudly- I think especially the way that I look at people really has a huge amount of communication.

I could just learn sign language!!! Haha

Some one liners to think about...

2010-07-05T20:49:00.000-05:00

God has much more to offer than what the 'Church' offers.

---

As the church, we have short-changed our culture by holding back everything that we have to give.

TK Chapter Four – U-Haul

2010-06-17T10:30:00.000-05:00

(This chapter is about, basically, picking up and moving and figuring out what things can come or not…)

“What both excites you and scares you about the potential of a new spiritual road trip?”

I think the one thing that is exciting- although I’m not sure if that’s the word I would use – is that whenever there is a shift in life and we face change, there is opportunity to grow and to know the Lord more and possibly in a different way than before.

Something that scares me (again, not sure about ‘scare’ as the best choice of word), is the idea that I’m moving forward into a seeming void. In other words, I have no idea what’s next. The other thing that I have concern about is the possibility of basically sitting around, waiting for whatever is next to happen. But, we all know that the next doesn’t just come, it has to be sought after…

However, I find that when I get praying and talking to the Lord about these things and asking him to keep leading me forward, I feel propelled to keep going and walk into the unknown.

Another thing I have wondered about is if things are about to change in my life and the ministry that I will be doing is going to change, how will people take that? I’m curious to see if the expectations that people have placed on my life will budge out of the way or if they will try to grasp and hold on like someone who is drowning. We’ll see.

“If Jesus were to trim down your Christian experience to his essentials, what would he remove? What would be left?”

I think this question assumes that my Christian experience is bloated with all sorts of activity and busyness so that there is a sort of façade of spirituality. So, I’m not sure how to answer, because at present, my life is quite different than that.

TK Chapter Three - Tremors

2010-06-16T16:48:00.001-05:00

Chapter 3 – Tremors

What is this chapter about? It outlines some of the common tensions that exist when someone gets a gist of what could be and compares it to present circumstances. Book says, “The tension exists because we all tend to understand and recognize the mess we’re in, but we can’t translate that knowledge into our “Body,” our churches. Briefly, here are the tensions discussed:

Tension because of a broken heart (by looking at the reality and state of the world we live in).
Tension can arise from simple frustration of energy and resources wasted. (We’ve tried everything)
Tension can bring fear. (Mostly, fear of change)
Tension arises when you see the structure of church falling, and you realize that everything the church stood on may go down too.
(Possibly because of all the other tensions) We have a massive tension related to identity.

“Do you feel the tensions about your faith? In what ways are they like the ones we talked about in this chapter? In what ways are they different?”

On some level I can relate to all the tensions mentioned in the chapter. I’ve gone through some sort of personal dilemma because of these things. Knowing that there is something different that we ought to be doing but that we aren’t willing to do is really a kicker. I see this happening around me all the time, and I see it in myself, too.

I think if I can boil it down to anything, it’s that we have so much knowledge, but no real understanding. If we understood the things we know and have been taught, we would be acting very differently and our lives would be drastically changed.

The one tension that I think I have been faced with personally is knowing that there can be something different with the Church, but have a very hard time seeing the possibility of it and wondering where the opportunity for it is. There is a hunger for something deeper and bigger than what we experience within the Church, but the opportunity to satiate that hunger evades us greatly.

Perhaps another tension of mine is that I seemingly have no idea what to say to people, or even what to model, for them to understand and see the difference and thus come along to something different. I’m reminded now about something that was said at a House Church seminar I attended last summer: You can’t duplicate something that you have not experienced. I think that is fairly true. Implementing change doesn’t come about from concepts; rather, it comes about through hard work and perseverance. But how can one know what to work hard towards, without first knowing it?

“Have you noticed the Jerusalem and Galilean distinctions in your own church experience? How?"

(The book addresses a type of battle within the church between two camps of Christians- it says, “One we’ll call ‘Jerusalem Christians’ (those who see the person of Jesus through their traditions and the literal interpretation of doctrine) and the other ‘Galilee Christians’ (those who see the Christian message through the person of Jesus and the narratives about his life). Often, Jerusalem Christians turn belief into dogma: arbitrary rules of life that people are held to beyond their common sense.”)

I have seen this distinction over and over and over again. It’s everywhere. A lot of the time I see leaders within the church being much more on the Jerusalem side of things. However, I also see that duplicated in the lives of people they are leading, and in turn the motion of a group is swayed as well. Churches are full of people that are like this- far more concerned about the obedience to the ‘law’ of the Church rather than loving God and loving their neighbors. What’s worse is that anyone who is in a position like that is also persuaded in their own mind that what they are doing is correct. They may even be confronted with the fact that they aren’t right and that there is something much different, but they’ll say, “Oh yes, I’m with you on that one.” It’s very blind.

I have seen less Christians who you could clump into the “Galilean” camp. What I see a lot of times are Christians who are either too far gone into a “Jerusalem” mindset, or they have gone the opposite way and live a life of compromise. The Galilean camp isn’t even middle-ground. It’s just different.

These are people who choose to engage with what is around them because of a sense of purpose. Their lives are bought with the blood of Jesus and they know that. They know that they are redeemed from a place of darkness to a place of light. They understand grace. They know that people mess up. They know that life is full of surprises and some of them are good while some are bad. They know that mistakes happen quite often and yet to continue to hold people to their mistakes is even a worse mistake in itself. They might be unordinary, misplaced, misfits, broken, downtrodden, poor, destitute… but they still love Jesus. Since they understand grace they know that their lives are in the hands of God and he is good!

Book says, “Galilean Christians were forced to deal honestly with the grey areas. Jerusalem Christians strive for perfection in the minutest details, whereas Galilean Christians just want to make sure they don’t mess up on any of the ‘biggies’ (the atonement, justice, mercy, love, benevolence, and advocacy for the poor, oppressed, and sinners, to name a few)”

I’ve talked to a lot of people who want to be in the Galilean camp. It just seems to be somewhat rare to find anyone that’s there…

2010-06-09T22:13:00.001-05:00

Something to think about:

God's ability to lead us is far greater than our ability to try and figure things out on our own.

TK Chapter Two – Elvis Has Left The Building

2010-06-02T19:57:00.000-05:00

(Dear reader, if you feel so inclined, interact with me! Thanks!)

Thinking about what you just read, and considering what Jesus said in Matthew 5:13 – “You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men” – what are some of the ways you believe we’re losing our saltiness?

I’ve done a lot of reading in the last several years. A good portion of the books I have read have atleast some semblance of recognizing that we have got things wrong in the Church and something needs to change. However, admittance does not always lead to action. One thing that I see happening a lot of the time is that we discuss issues but don’t take the hard step toward change. Perhaps this is because of a lack of ownership, I’m not sure. At any rate, I have seen many authors and many friends and family spout their perspective on what is wrong and what could be right. One thing I have learned is that our problems are many, and to try and pinpoint and get to the center of it all is like maneuvering through a ball of twisted up yarn. It seems like everything is attached.

There is something else to note – and that is that there are exceptions to the general observations about the Church. There are people who are doing things the Kingdom way. However, these are exceptions, and I fear that too many times the exceptions are used as a cop out for personal responsibility.

If there is one thing that I think has destroyed the saltiness and the flare of the Church, it is our own selves. When it comes down to it, we are self-absorbed to the point that we may think we are loving God by due-diligence, yet we are far from it. We may think that we are loving our neighbor but will abandon ship when it gets ugly. We pick and choose who to love instead of being sacrificial. We have covered selfishness from A to Z. When we bring this into the Church it affects everything from what worship is, what the preacher is saying, what the programs do, to how much coffee you can get before and after the service.

Consumerism seems to be a driving force behind much of what we do, rather than love that demands sacrifice. Convenience determines what we do – “I’ll do it because I don’t even have to lift a finger” – instead of taking responsibility in our relationship with God, we do the most convenient thing- sit back and let someone else do it for us. If anyone did that in a marriage relationship, we’d call it adultery. Pluralism has infected a lot of us – we believe what we want to rather than what God wants us to. Idolatry is rampant in the Church. These things, and more, are just manifestations of a selfishness that is eating up the Church like a cancer.

The mission of the church is no longer to reach the lost and fulfill the Great Commission. Rather, a lot of places are trying to improve the quality of their church programs so that they can just keep the people that have been coming. Quality of programs never kept anyone. People keep people.

We have created a stumbling block for the lost. We are in the way of people who have genuine need for what Jesus has done. We block the way to him by our actions and the way the Church has hurt so many people over the years. “Christianity” and “The Church” have a bad rep and to many it is distasteful.

We do not know how to love one another. We have become religious drones who just show up and fill a seat rather than being Christlike to eachother. There are things that need to be said and things that need to be done, and this is just not happening. (It’s not convenient)

We have accepted injustice in our midst and in our communities. There are a number of things that are just plain and straight up wrong, and where the Church has an opportunity to shine in many dark places, we instead turn away to anything else as long as it is easier.

We have not understood what it means to follow Christ. One of the key elements is that of “ME” dying. Sacrifice. I think if we did understand, we would not be so selfish.

Doctrine this, theology that.

The list goes on and on.

If the Church is called to impact the world, then we have come up very short. One thing that I have been thinking about regarding this is that we have been confessing these shortcomings within the church for quite some time now. It’s not as if we’re unaware. We know what’s going on. But what has resulted from this acknowledgement? Not much. If there is anything to say about this, I think fear (of man) has held so many back from bringing in any sort of change. There is a great desire for change, but desire is so often thwarted by fear.

Another thing that concerns me is that we have talked and discovered so much about the Church, but we stay the same. When are people going to draw the line? When are we finally going to cross from “we’re doing something wrong” to “Let’s do something right” ?

On a personal level…

I’ve been trained to do ministry. Yet, I’ve been trained to do ministry in a context that perpetuates this kind of dying Church. There are all sorts of things that pull me away from doing Kingdom work. There seems to be no end to the amount of things that can distract me from doing the sort of things that I know the Holy Spirit would lead me to do. I have found it difficult to maintain an approach to life that is not selfish, since I am encouraged to be selfish all the time. Another thing that has been changing in me is that I am becoming more like what God has built me to be. It’s crazy, and I’m surprised at times about some of the things I say that I wouldn’t have said before. I’m caring less and less about taboo things and cultural norms that don’t make sense. It’s all very interesting.

What do you think the increasing disinterest of the culture toward the church means for the future of the church?

I think there will always be people that will go to Church. They’ve been trained to do that. It’s religious.

But I think the traditional church is in danger of catastrophic loss. It is already starting, and it’s like an avalanche – it only gets bigger.

But I don’t think that the Church will just diminish in time. God is up to things, and his people will flourish. He’s not about to leave his people alone. He is not one to abandon anything that belongs to him. He is moving in the earth and he is moving in North America. There will be a shift in time that will shape and redefine what we have known so long. He longs to express his love to the earth through his people. He is waiting for his bride to come and allow him to have Lordship again. It is only a matter of time. More and more people are rising up to the challenge. The challenge is to follow and pursue Christ with an undying passion and live a life that is Kingdom oriented. Jesus, we’re coming for you. Come for us, too.

TK Chapter One - Fiona - Reflection Q's

2010-05-23T19:59:00.000-05:00

“Describe some times in your life when you’ve wanted to tap out on God and the activities of the church.”

The first thing that comes to mind is when I have personal struggles and I want to “avoid.” It seems that when I’m failing in some fashion or going through some difficulty, I don’t want to face people and in the midst of it I don’t want to face God to account for failure. It’s a fear of shame. It’s also something called, “keeping up appearances.” I have a kind of reputation among my brothers and sisters in the Lord about how my spiritual life is. It is not that what they perceive is not true, it’s just that I don’t show all of it – success and failure. Also, when I feel that I have let myself down it transfers into my dealings with others. It’s in all of this that I have times when I feel I have nothing to give. It’s also very easy to avoid people in our culture. Since we keep to ourselves so much, it’s just really easy. I think that the rejection I’ve faced in the past has also had an effect in this area: if I let people see my failures, will they still accept me? I know I can say that the thing that matters the most is knowing that I am accepted and love by God no matter what….but it is part of being human to be loved by people too.

Another thing that comes to mind is that if I have conflict with people. This has come up in the last couple of years in church context. I don’t like conflict. I wasn’t able to learn good conflict skills from my family- growing up conflict was always a negative thing and had negative outcomes. It seems that is the prefix that I have to conflict and confrontation, and it prevents me at times from seeing that these things can be positive.

Perhaps one last thing that I could think of can be described as “This just isn’t working!” If results were always instantaneous, we’d all be filthy rich and wouldn’t know what to do with ourselves! But it’s not that way, and some things just take time. I think I get discouraged by things not going the way they ought, to the point that instead of trying to trudge through I would rather give up. Thinking about this now, it seems this could be related to being able to start things but not necessarily finish them. I need other people to complete the whole picture.

“Describe the last time your heart broke for someone.”

It seems that this happens when I’m praying more than any other time. There are times when I am interceding for someone or maybe for a group of people and become somewhat overwhelmed with what is happening when I am praying. I often experience the Lord pointing out things for me to pray for people, and sometimes it’s just very heavy.

TK Intro Reflection

2010-05-21T21:07:00.000-05:00

I've started reading and working through this book called The Tangible Kingdom. Since there are reflection questions at the end of each chapter, I figured that this might be something interesting to blog about...
So, this is the first of it - hopefully I'm faithful to do more... :)
Oh and for you, the reader, it may be difficult to understand where the questions are coming from, since you didn't read the book!! :P

"As you ponder the metaphor of this sailor, this village, the wreckage, and the people, reflect on your own experience with church. What aspects have been meaningful, and which expreiences do you hope to put behind you?"

I think in my own experience I have been in multiple positions on the boat. I've been on the top mast, looking for safety and looking for a place to land (the village). I've been just a person using the boat to get from a to b. I have been a member of the crew several times, and I have been a captain on the boat in several different contexts.

Reflecting on my experience in the church could be long...
I have seen many things that would sway me to avoid the church. People, close to me, getting hurt by things going on. I have seen leadership in all its glorious corruption. I have seen money being mishandled. I have seen people used rather than valued. All in all, I have been part of many boats that are on their way to shipwreck or are already there. My own experience with the church is that because i'm gifted/talented in many ways, I have felt exploited at times as if I am just another resource. This hit me hard in a particular way that I didn't realize for a couple of years - in leading worship. Over time I heard many different comments and perspectives on what worship is and what it is not that I was quite discouraged and in a strange way, didn't want to bother anymore. It is very disheartening, considering that is one of my favorite things to do...

I have also led several things that I can say have more or less shipwrecked. Recently I have been leading a house church and this has been a whirlwind. If I were to be honest about the experience from my point of view, I think we were headed for shipwreck when we had just got started. We may have had a few shining moments, but once we shipwrecked, even though we were all wiped out and tired, here I was leading the others back to the wreckage to salvage something- anything, and go at it again. Do that several times over and here I am, somewhat dissillusioned, wondering if I can even step into another role like that again. I know others were left dissappointed. Perhaps they expected the world out of me, but I wasn't going to be able to give it to them.

I have had many many many meaningful experiences in the Church. All of them seem to center around having an encounter with the Lord in the many ways that he manifests and reveals himself to his people. This has been both in celebration services, conferences, small groups, solo... reflecting on this earlier this year I thought that it is impossible to have an encounter with the Lord and not be changed in some fashion. To me this is the bread and butter of it all - getting to know the Lord in a very personal manner!

If I were to leave anything behind in terms of the Church, it would be the kind of Christianity that is so self-absorbed that it cares nothing for anything else. The culture of north american brand Christianity is absurd and distasteful.

So where does that leave me?
I think I have a couple of choices. I can look back on all the shipwrecks and continue in a jaded, disappointed, and dillusional state - perhaps thinking that there is some glimmer of hope within all the wreckage. However, I don't think it would take long for cold, bitter reality to set in and for the rose-colored glasses (what's left of the rose coloring) to become clear. I have heard others say that they feel called to the institutional church, knowing somewhat of the challenges before them. I may have felt this way several times, however, thinking back to all the shipwrecks, and thinking about moving forward... I don't want to duplicate the failures of the past - even if that means having a future that's moving forward with nothing on the plate.

Here I find the second choice: to move forward without much consideration for what was. It would be as if I floated to shore, unconscious and unaware, to be awakened hours later by the sun beaming down and burning my skin. Once I regain some composure and understand my whereabouts, I look out to the bay only to see what I thought wouldn't be possible, yet there it is: my sunken boat, still somewhat visible, but certainly not salvageable. Perhaps there is this moment of grieving and loss that urges me to run out waiste deep in the water, only to give up because of the task that I can now see is not something I am unfit to accomplish. After wading back to shore, I look back one more time, and say, "It's okay" and continue to walk forward- not knowing what to encounter, but being ready for discovery.

Cooliris

2010-03-23T21:51:00.001-05:00

THIS is really cool!

Observations of the Facebook...

2010-03-11T20:39:00.001-05:00

Several months ago now, I decided to rid myself of the ever-growing and popular social networking blitz called Facebook.

...

I was talking with J.G. about Facebook. She's given it up for Lent and I asked her if she is going to get rid of it completely. We ended up having some sort of discussion about Facebook that I thought was worthy of putting on the blog thing.

The following are some observations and comments. (Which, I'm sure are general, and I'm sure there are more many more things that could be said etc etc etc.)

Facebook does a great job at connecting people. This mission-like statement came from here: "[Facebook is about] Giving people the power to share and make the world more open and connected." What Facebook desires to do, it does well.

Facebook is a a great tool. Many people have commented that Facebook is a great way to keep in touch with people that you otherwise would not. Although this sounds good, I think in reality it seems that having meaningful friendships with several hundred people is a difficult thing. If you are able to do this: big kudos! It's nice to catch up with people that I haven't seen or talked to for years. Even the people who in the second grade were bullies to me! However, people who I contact and have relationship with the most are the same ones who I can contact and connect with aside from Facebook. J.G. said, "The people I'm motivated to contact, or the people who want to contact me, can do it without Facebook"

Facebook gives a false impression of relationship success. Neither does it give the word "friend" any justice.

Facebook makes certain relational aspects of life quantifiable. In a society that is riddled with rejection and fear because of it, we tend to try and measure our acceptance by others with different means. It appears that Facebook is becoming a very big measuring tape in the anti-rejection line. Mark says, "Some people who are on Facebook still feel like they aren`t measuring up. It's not the solution."

Facebook is a social information highway! J.G. says, "It isn't really comforting that people have all that information about me available just by clicking on my page" You can kill many of these options, however, many do not. While I still had Facebook, many people expressed minor frustration that they couldn't leave a simple message because I didn't have a wall. Oops!

Facebook makes for shortcuts in relationships. It aids people in knowing information about you without the process of knowing you. J.G. says, "For sure. It's kind of damaging to relationships, because it skips the process of allowing someone to get to know you"

Facebook wastes time. J.G. says,"I don't really DO anything on Facebook. It takes up time, and I'll spend that time just clicking on random people's pages. And that's not healthy at all." You can get an extension for Firefox (link) to show how much time you have wasted on Facebook. Wasted time has cost the corporate world billions of dollars (see this article as an example).

Facebook can be addictive. Are personal relationships taking a backseat to Facebook? Do you think about Facebook even when you’re offline? Do you use Facebook to escape problems or homework? Do you stay on Facebook longer than intended? Have you ever concealed Facebook use? If you answered yes to any of these questions, this article says you could be addicted! Here are 8 ways to beat the "Facebook Syndrome"

Facebook is a money making machine. It is not uncommon that some of the most successful money-making schemes thrive on exploiting basic human needs. Having a sense of acceptance is something everyone craves, and there are many industries that thrive on this. The fashion industry, for example: "Each year, over $250 billion is spent on fashion (including accessories) in the United States and over $20 billion in revenue is generated annually."(link) Although Facebook may not have been made with this idea in mind, it has caught on to the fact that money is to be made (so you like those ads eh?). Forbes.com tacks Zuckerberg, the creator of Facebook, at #158 (in 2009) out of 400 (Net Worth of $2,000 Million).

Finally, J.G. had one of those conversation concluding remarks: "It's weird that Facebook is a relationship killer, when it was made for keeping in touch with people, eh?"

Here's a question: Did we have meaningful friendships before social networking websites came along? Or did we all suffer from the lack of ability to track the activity in our friends' lives? What would life be like without Facebook...? I hope we haven't forgotten!

I'm not advocating getting rid of Facebook. Just pointing out some things. Some of these observations cross over to other internet social bases like forums and chat rooms etc. I realize that most people still maintain some sort of real, healthy, and authentic social life outside of the Facebook world. But then again, I don't know everyone. :)

@ the Mall

2010-03-02T20:53:00.000-05:00

Today I was at the mall doing some meandering and a little bit of shopping. While I was sitting down reading and drinking a Maple Latte from Second Cup, I thought about something while I watched the ever-growing diversity of people passing by:

The mall is a hub for people. It is a place for people to come and purchase things, and it's popularity shows something about our culture - that we are quite materialistic and not spiritual. We are concerned far more about the trends of man than the trends in the kingdom of Heaven. Imagine if people swarmed the Church the way that they swarmed the mall. Imagine if people lined up to receive the free gift of grace the same way that they will line up for the latest, hottest release of such and such. The mall as a hub for people shows a glimpse where the heart of our society lies.

God stir up a hunger in our society for you!

Quote on Religion

2010-02-25T20:18:00.000-05:00

"Religion is the antithesis of the kingdom of God. And the kingdom - the realm of the King's domain - is what every man, woman, and child longs for deep within their hearts. Religion creates appetites it cannot fulfill. By nature it carries a value for form without power, information without experience. It makes outward appearance a priority over the issues of the heart. For this reason religion does not provide an opportunity to actually know God, and it is therefore cruel, powerless, and boring."

-Bill Johnson, Face to Face with God

2010-02-10T23:06:00.003-05:00

(Am I going to blog now? hmm...)

Today during lunch at work we were talking about childhood memories. We tried to think about how far back we could remember. I can only go to about 4 or 5 - and very few at that. It's funny though that the only things I seem to remember are the things that have some level of either trauma or emotional attachment.

We used to have big fires at my house. Big ones. Recent by-law additions have changed this rather significant bi-monthly event to being non-existent. When I was young, maybe 5 and possibly 6, I was outdoors near the fire-pit. We had a fire that day and when I came to it later, there were no more flames. What I did then would only be done as an adult by sheer stupidity or by getting paid by someone who wants to make you look stupid. But I was young (and please note, not stupid). For some reason, as I was near this fire-pit, curiosity gripped the very core of my being, and I walked straight into the pile of ashes only to find that seconds later I had red-hot coals inside my shoe.

Not good.

After that all I remember is a lot of crying, and a sleepless night.